Though times don't last, but tough people do. Been a while since i talked to my angel. Talking to Shauna, made me see the good in people and i came to a realisation that i was broken, morally. I've lost what i had and she made me see that. She probably doesn't know, but that doesn't matter. The thing that matters is knowing that i know. Some times, all you need is the right words from the right people at the right time. Thanks for the conversation. Glad I started it ;) i cant even describe the feeling when i see her face. Lol 😊😊 YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

It hurts so much it burns. It literally burns inside. I dont know what to do anymore. Its the same problem but with more complication. Like wth am I still in track and field? Its a new academic year and i assume things were gonna get better, but i was wrong thus far. Its worse. A whole lot worse. When i was the field captain, my main priority was to keep the field side tgt. That was part of my role. I tried my best to fulfill my duty as the captain. Damn i was doing it will my heart and now, i've passed it the torch to someone who is capable. Wilfred. He has so much potential to be captain and more. But now, it seems that he has lost sight of why i chose him as captain, aside from the reason that he was the only one. He had the drive, the motivation to make field side a stronger team. He had a vision for us. Make us big. Recently, his grandmother passed away, and it has taken an overwhelming toll on him. She was one of the closest person he had in his family. I was sorry for his loss, gave him a piece of advice and moral support. A week later, his other grandmother was sent to the hospital. I was shocked just as he was. But the pain i felt wasn't anywhere near his. At that point, i only prayed that he would pull through. May God bless him with the strength to pull through this time of crisis. I understand his feelings. On top of that, there wasn't many ppl who joined the field side, only a handful.  Wilfred thought he could pull more ppl into joining the field side. Apparently, i was disappointed as well, but i didn't expect much so my disappointment wasn't as bad as wilfred's. that all happened for the past few weeks. And wilfred's grandmother is getting better as we speak. Hope she stays that way until its time for her to departure naturally. Its been a week or so, and i feel that wilfred is losing hope. Losing motivation. Losing drive. Yesterday, during training, he was alone doing warm up, stretching and drills. On top of that, he took really long doing just that. He spent most of the time staring into space. I think its getting to him. All the time when i was captain, i trained alone cause there was no one to train along side. I had nobody. Now, i have Zong Sheng by my side cause he choose train with me. I was all there was to the field side by heart. There's also Willie, who's coming back to my side. I never lost faith in him tbh. I always knew he would be there with me till we graduate. I kept calling him to come training to the point he would be the one ending up calling me to come down to train. He is now one of my motivation. I'm proud of him and i can safely say i have passed my will of fire on to him. He's now trying to pull the others to come for training even though they rarely come for training. Yesterday, he showed me the power of friendship during training. I almost gave up while doing my sets. After the first 100m, i almost gave up. My throat was dry. I was exhausted. But he said to me 'cmon! We can do this!' If he could do it, why can't i? So i finished another 2 100m, almost puking before running the last one. So now, back to Wilfred. It seems he has lost his will of fire. I intend to start a spark so he is able to let it burn once more.  YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

There are times when you act differently when you're with a certain grp of people or person subconsciously. You may not be able to figure it out, but from another pov, its obvious. One may deny it, but it its a fact. Just like how we are. You don't simply change the way you talk or text for no reason..  YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)