I've been thinking about how to improve myself in track and studies. Well, for track, i figured that i need to reduce the impact my body has to take from the work outs and increase my body's strength and endurance to minimise injuries. Cause a stronger body can withstand stronger impacts. I got myself a pair of ankle support. Well, at the moment just 1, cause there is no more stock.. Hehee. Gonna get some resistant bands for my own workouts.. Finally gonna get some! And not forgetting a new pair of tights~ nyehehe. I'm so psyched for training! :D:D

And i realised... Without cca, i have a lot of time to spare. I got to know when i missed my training on friday. Why? Wasnt feeling too good. And i forgot to bring a few things for training as well. Like my shirt and towel. I did went back to school, and sat down in the clubroom to study. I studied for a while and realised that only half an hour had gone by and i covered 1 topic. Had a chat w my ssc peeps too cause they were there. I continued to study til 10+. Then i thought to myself.. Wow, w/o cca, i have a lot of time to myself. Really a lot. Maybe thats how hannan did it. Maybe thats how the others did it.. They had more time to study. I have to spend like 5h for my cca, including dinner. Now its been reduced to 4h cause i dont join the team for dinner anymore. That 4h could be used to study 3 lectures! Dayumm. Times 3 while im at it. That means half a day yo! BUT, i have no regrets. Cause i have invested my time in my health, social life, and a wonderful experience in T&F!! Coach says i can jump 6.5m if i could get my take off right! I need the height in my take off~ sigh... Thats hard for me :( and my plyo isnt that good either :c Im gonna change that! In 3 weeks. Thats my target!! In 3 wks, i shall hit minimally 5.5m~ it had been a long time since i did a full run for long jump, so my std kinda dropped by a lot. Hit like only 4.8m :/ that sucks cause 30+cm is a lot.. Meng had been doing well though. I like his company when training. Cause a lot of peeps havent been showing up lately. Esp Haikal.. Idk what happened to him.. To us.. We grew further apart since exams. We were once so bonded but now, a barrier appeared btwn us once again. He has gone wild while i'm still tamed. He has gone drinking and clubbing while im studying and training.. He still has the power, i must admit. His strength is hard for me to keep up.. Hope it gets better as we go. On the bright side, the freshies came in! And theres quite a few keepers~ ;) pretty and cute girls under me.. Hahaah. But i wont do anything funny.. Teeheee. I'm still after sufiyah. Even though i dont really know how the hell i'm gonna do it. I've been pushed away countless times, even though she said she's not.. And i've been denied and it took me down hard. Now im up but i cant do much. Im not in sch most of the time when she's in sch. Only on thur.... But then im busy too. If im not wrong, our lunch break is the same.. Maybe thats my opening.. Hmm.. Lols. Kk i shall think it through deeper cause what im doing isnt enough~ and i gotta find a styrofoam for my plan~ ;);) see ya guys~ cheers! :D

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

ACHIEVEMENT UNLOCKED: 8 MUSCLE UPS.

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

So school has started. First semester of the second year. I can alr feel the stress and horror of the upcoming 2 years in my course, maybe more to ngee ann as a whole. I have moved to a course called CLT, clinical lab tech. So basically, i will be spending my time in the hospitals and polyclinics to complete my diploma in my course. I'm currently attached to NUH. Next sem i'll be in TTSH, followed by NUH/polyclinic in the third year for final year project and internship. So in CLT, i learn about diagnosis of diseases. So far, i've handled with urine, kidney stones, blood, serum and other stuffs relating to chemistry. I'm doing special chem for 2 weeks, the move on to another dept in chemistry. Then i'll do haematology and microbiology. Then that will mark the end the first sem, after tests and exams of course. I spend 4 days in NUH and a day in NP for studies. But... I still go back to ngee ann for T&F. So almost everyday i go back to sch. I can tell you that it is very tiring. I am the captain of the field side so i cant afford to miss so many trg. I feel exhausted everyday. I think its cause of training. It kills me. So i like drop dead everywhere. In lectures, i KO at every final 10mins. Shit. Gotta focus man! Tsk. There is still a long way to go.. Wish me luck~ (:

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Not interested in anyone else..

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Well i am so fucked up right now after an awesome day! Just fuck la sia. Today really roller coaster ride. Knnccbpmk ah sial. Where should i start..? From the top? I'll make it fast. So i went to sch for training in the morning. Reached sch at 645am. Intended to start trg early and end it by 11. Well, today is gymming, so i asked a few ppl to tag along. There was karloke, a track senior. He didnt turn up due to personal reasons. Halim, who couldnt wake up early to gym. And hannan. Lol. Well, i ate breakfast at 7. A breakfast set like good old times, with 2 extra eggs. So i ate 2 pc kaya bread, and 4 eggs w teh si. Saw some familiar ppl involved in baoc. Then i slacked at cca clubroom for a while til 8. Arranged to meet hannan at 9 in sch. Well, i reached the grandstand, and guess what. Baoc came crashing into my territory. Well, at least i'm a nice guy who doesnt chase them off the track when they used it. Played it cool and stayed cool. Watched them carry out their things. Saw a lot of cute girls and a few hot ones~ lol but i wasnt interested. Then i go fitness corner and did 6 muscle ups and 8x4 pull ups. Did that while waiting for hannan. Then i rested and slept in several positions. Then they started leaving, and i started warm up since hannan reaching soon. So i warmed up and streched. then hannan came. He came at 1030. Wow. At least he had a VR. His grandma was admitted to the hosp. She too old for doing daily tasks like gg toilet and stuff. Then she vomitted uncontrollably and other stuff. Thankfully she okay.. So we went gym, i did legs, hannan did upper body. We saw charmaine teh also. + point. Lol. Then we ate at poolside and went off to meet zu at clementi, and halim at pasir ris. And we set off to WWW, wildwildwet. Im not in the mood to say much, so here's a summary. We circled the lazy river twice, did the slide, half pipe and back to the lazy river. We talked to this lifeguard, and apparently we became friends.  her name was Kim. She's friendly and nice. When we lapped the river, norman came and changed. He wore white pants. Duhh, he had to cover it cause we could see through it. Hehehe. Then he changed and wore over a red pants. We intro him to Kim and we kept seeing her when we were there. Had a small chat every time. Oh, i was wayne, hannan was hannan, halim was john, zu was jack and norman was norman. Lols. There were 2 lifeguards that were pretty. Well, halim asked for one of their names, Annway. Well, i didnt ask cause i din want aything to happen. Was it a mistake? I mean for a reason i think is valid. I'll get to that soon. Then i got the other girl to hold my hand and help me up at the half pipe. When it was all over, we went to bath and change. Well, zu lost his wallet and we went all over the place looking for it. Then, finally, we checked the guest relation office. Fortunately, one of the workers, Francis, found it. Then went to eat dinner with Kim. We ate at Popyes cause norman had a 50% discount coupon on a lot of offers. I ate 2 meals with the coupon and a large mashed potato. Well, it was delicious and worth the money. Less than $10 in all. Hahah thanks norman :) then, the reason i sulked all the way back home.. Halim and hannan saw me in that awful state. I'd keep quiet and just stare into space. That moment.. If you see me like that, sth definitely happened. And if i say i'm okay, i'm definitely not okay.. The thing is, i wasnt really friendzoned by sufiyah, more like acquaintance-zoned. And not only that, her words are are sharp and harsh as hell. When a girl says, "why do i even need to go out with you?" oh you know you're screwed. Its in your face. In my face. Well fuck it.
FUCK IM NOT EVEN IN THE RIGHT PLACE TO ARGUE WITH YOU OVER SUCH A THING. THAT IS JUST IT. ITS ME, I AM TOO NICE AND SHE'S TOO INNOCENT. I CAN DO THIS, I CAN DO THAT. "BUT WHY DO YOU EVEN NEED TO DO IT??"
Its not a need, but a want. But i cant even do that. Fuck the whole universe sia. I cant do anything in peace. It may be peaceful in the environment, but not mentally. I dont know how long i can last.. The last time i tried, i could ony stand 1 month. Idk if i can do it. Oh, rmb why i din ask for the girls' name? Cause i have my limits to being cheeky w girls. I can go so much further if i could, i its a matter if i want to or not..
I can do this again, repeat history, but at a higher level and difficulty. Cause there is sth different about sufiyah.. Idk what it is, but it is definitely sth incredible. If i were to wait, it'll probably take a few years just to get close to her.. Idk what to do la! I cant let it go!! I cant let it out!! Well i have plans but idk if it'll be worthwhile. I'll just have to wait and see~~


YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

I've been thinking a lot lately. About a lot of things. Well, one of them is my jumps. Looking back, what i have been doing is not enough for me to progress significantly. The workout given to me is mainly for maintaining my performance and a bit more than that. Now, i realise i really have to push myself! Push myself to my limits and train properly, from warm up, to stretching, to drills, to my form, to sprints and finally to cool down. These minute details i missed out plays a huge difference in my development. I've seen what Mengster could do. How he was just like me and continued his passion and strive for the best, acheiving what we thought was beyond our capabilities. His commitment and passion was the drive in his journey. Now i have mine. Ever since i became the captain, i know people would look up to me and ask for guidance and for help. I need to be the one to motivate them and light the path and the spirit in them. I've been reflecting on my capabilities, amd i know i can do so much more. I can reach the height of an average long jumper and the technique i have is considered better than others. But i need so much more power to compete with the others. During this holidays, i believe i have improved in my vertical jumps and i know that in a month or two, when competition starts, i will be hitting above 5.5, hopefully~ :)) well, i'm aiming 6 for polite, and i'm surely aiming for 6.5 for ivp. The competition is getting fierce and tougher every single time, so i have to step up my game like everyone else! If u cant train with the rest, i'll train on my own. If i can't train my legs, i'll train my core and back. I'll do more than what i have previously done. I want to be known for excelling in my event. Show the others that being a jumper can be amazing and it takes more than just power to do it. But like any other sports, the key is passion. Passion beats talent. Even though that is not 100% true, the amt of effort we put in will in the end turn into the the results we hope to acheive! Rmb, PASSION BEATS TALENT~ ^^

That would be me some day...

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

I cant explain my feelings, but on the bus to woodlands to meet halim, i passed zhenghua pri and saw sufiyah! And i was like, is this for real?? Hahahah. She was looking at her phone, and i kept on saying, pls look up pls look up. She looked up, and saw me. I waved at her and smiled. She was surprised, so was i. Lol. I smiled so gard my heart beat faster and tears of joy came out. I dont know how or why, but i felt so happy just seeing her face. It has been a very long time since i actually saw her. Still, i have never experienced this kind of happiness before, not for a girl at least. Just my best buds and family. Heheh. Anyway, i'd like to thank Halim dear, for making this happen. I love you man! So much homo in this love~ hahahah jk. adios ^^

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

I've been thinking why i'm so caught up with the situation. Like any other, i did my reflection and sort of cleared my mind while doing my exercises~ then it struck me. There just isnt anything wrong with the situation. Its me. I am the problem. Well, maybe cause i am too caring and cautious. That has always been the case when i'm with girls. My decisions are partly influenced by their well being. I try not to disturb them or break them in any way. Well that and the fact that im a fucking dumbhole. Im freaking cocked up. Besides the fact that i'm awesome, i'm also too kind. I can be an ass, but ppl wont like me like that. I wouldnt too. I'd rather be a too-good boyy than a badass boy. Tsk. Its like everything "if thats okay with you". I'll rarely say, "okay, lets go do this". For instant, i went to the clinic w my grandma and came at 3.20pm. It was closed and i was like okay, we'll come back tmr after making appointment. I have to be like my father. He called me and argued w the nurse w me on the line. He was like, "cmon nurse! My mother, 80 years old alr come here and you send her back? Be reasonable la!" he has a point for fuck. And like right now.. Waiting for norman and trying not to disturb him when he clearly needs to come down now. Well fuck it. Imma disturb him. Bye.

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

At times like this, i hate myself and everything else! >:(

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

To all those bloggers out there, you should know that this is one of the few places where you can write a freaking long essay and not complain about it. well, i dont plan to write so much since i dun really have the mood to write much, but i have to let it out somehow..

The universe works in a strange way. its just all so weird. and from a guy who is already weird to the world, thats something. why am i so interested? why am i only doing this now? why am i getting all these complications? the world is too small and i am facing troubles everywhere. something that i failed to do would probably turn into something horrible somewhere else. looking back, why did i even left it out? a simple acknowledgement would have been nice. now i cant bear to face it. oh man.. and now this shit comes about and i am in this pile of shit, could the shit hole get any bigger and worse? damn son! i am so wasted la sia. i cant even clean a small pile and a whole load of it comes to me multiplying the effects by 10 times. fuck this la. all so small can get so big. who what where when i also dont know. cant even get anything out. how da fuck am i suppose to move fwd then? shit hole la. things i do will not be known. the things that i would do to get shit in return is just shit. well, fuck all these shit. SHIT is a commonly used word by me now cause that is how i am feeling right now.

I cant progress. I cant move. I cant go anywhere. And when i get a chance, some shit bounds to happen to me. SHIT. that is just how it is. the only thing i can do is hope that the shit i get is the one i can clean up. YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

I just love to listen to these songs~ they make me light in my head. bringing me to my own world...





YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

Things just don't seem to work out. Especially when perseverance alone is not enough.. YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)

Been working for the past few days! Siol ah penat rabak gile man!! 5 days straight doing activities. Cause it was holiday period, we had so many activites. Mostly games all the way! Good friday and easter! So many games, so many bunnies to go! Had a party on saturday and it waz krazy man! Was outdanced by William. He was crazy. More than just sugar rush! No stopping him fron dancing. No stopping any of the kids from dancing or screaming at any time. At the pool, party and all. Siol ah tiring sial. But it was FUN!! Mimi was rmb as the guy who danced crazy and the one in the bunny suit! Heheh ^^

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)