I just dont know.. I havent been in the pink of health for the past few weeks. Today is definitely one of the worst. I cant move freely like how I was able to. The left part of my body is in pain. Pain so bad it feels like being stabbed. Okay, maybe its exaggerated, but its worse than a sprained ankle or wrist. Idk whats wrong with me. My sister said, maybe its TB, tuberculosis. Its this disease that can be fatal, but there is a cure for it though. Hopefully, thats not it. I mean.. I'm too young to die. I've done too many sins and have yet to fulfil my dreams and take care of my parents. I have yet to love someone again and stay with her for the rest of my life. Well, i'll just have to pray for the best and my brother smells after showering!! Well the smell if smoking.. Heh.

Oh and theres this show I just happened to watch, "journey with me". I realised that when a typical guy meets rejection from a girl, he will just break down and remain silent. Doesnt really confront to her until quite a while. Well, it happened to me before.. I dont know if all guys are like that. But Idk.. I mean. (hannan's words to me from sufiyah indirectly) The thing about sufiyah is that she says that she's okay with being friends, texting and all, but she doesnt show it. At least not to me. So I cant really understand the situation and what I have to do. I cant really say that I want her in my arms cause I cant figure her out.. Maybe cause I dont really put effort as how I used to. Maybe cause my drive has been lost when she hit me hard the last time. Idk what to do alr.. Hopefully I can make it through the night and hope for a better tmr~ adios!