KnOcK kNoCk!

Monday, January 28, 2013

well fuck it. fuck my life. fuck my decisions. fuck it all. why? cause fuck me that s why. everything i do leads me back to square one. in what way? in every way. in every fucking way. all my life, what ever i do shows no result. there may be small improvements, but in the end, what do i get? experience. thats it. nothing more. i dun just get the sandwich. just the bread. no filling. no veggies. nothing. and maybe what i said was true i dun have a life. i dun have anything. i know i have the people around me. my family, friends, God and all, but i have nothing more, in a sense. and now it all strikes me right in the face. what you said, how you said it, you gave me hope. i dun know if it was true, but if it wasnt true, you just ruined part of my life. its may be small, but it a big one if you ask me. FUCK THIS SHIT. early in the morning i get this piece of fucked up shit. i had a good start to the day, and it all crumbles down in 5 mins. this is worse than the last time. but i have to say, at least its an honest act. but if history repeats itself, i may go krazy. i can only turn to Him for help. only He can truly show me the right way. one thing that i definitely gained from this was getting closer to Him. maybe this was just a lesson for me. a hard one. a guidance for me. i've been asking for it, but how it works, maybe this it it.... straight through me. i can be stubborn and follow the route i took the last time, or learn from my mistake. idk.. now i feel bad for all the vulgarities.. i should go. i have a test in half an hour..

YoU aRe NoT aLoNe~ =)